Is Fear Holding You Back?

We all have fears, and unfortunately as we grow older, sometimes our fears increase. What are you afraid of? Perhaps it’s failure, snakes, spiders or the dentist. Maybe you are afraid of being alone or of crowds. I know someone who is afraid of balloons and library books. Most of our fears are unfounded; they are something we make up with little basis in reality.

How do you conquer your fears? With Courage!

Do you have courage? What is courage? How do you get it? Why do you want it? What do you do with it once you have it?

According to the dictionary, courage is the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc., without fear; bravery. ‘

So Courage is also Bravery! Ah Ha!

Remember the Cowardly Lion in The Wizard of Oz? The concept completely overturned the typical belief that lions are brave. That unique and subtle message teaches us that no matter how great someone is, no matter how fearful they appear to be, they too are bound to have fear. Each one of us has our own set of fears that stop us from attaining our true potential.

Who are the most courageous, brave people you know? Children! They have no fear. That is the way all of us were born; fearless. Kids aren’t afraid of new things, of new adventures, of getting hurt, of trying new things. They pick up snakes and bugs, eat mud and jump over fences. Why? Because they are fearless super heroes with courage to spare!

Where is the courageous, fearless, brave child within you? We are conditioned as we get older to be afraid. We lose our bravery as we mature. Well intentioned adults, parents and friends sneak fear into our minds. They listen to our ideas and say ‘are you sure you want to do that? Is that really a good idea?’ They plant the seed that failing is, well, failing instead of an opportunity to learn and grow.

We allow our fear and other people’s doubts to interfere with what we want to do. You are having friends over for dinner and you want to try a new recipe, but what if it doesn’t turn out? You want to plant a rose bush, but what if it dies? You want to ask someone out on a date, but what if they say no? You want to start a new business, but what if it fails?

What if, what if, what if….

Yes, anytime you do something or start something you have to accept that it might not turn out as you had expected or hoped. For the most part there are few things that would be deadly if they didn’t turn out exactly as you had planned. If you job is to disarm a bomb and you make a mistake, OK, not good. If you go sky diving and forget to put on your parachute, OK, you are probably going to have a bad day! We spend too much time worrying about extreme examples such as these and it causes us to be fearful, to lack courage.

Henry Ford said “whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re probably right.”

So what is it you want to do? Go for a new job? Ask someone out? Start a new business? Be more of an extravert?  What do you need courage to try? Where does the courage come from?

Courage comes from within. You were born with it and you still have it. Self doubt is to courage what dust is to your coffee table. Sometimes it covers up the shine and the beauty. You just need to get a dust cloth and wipe it off!

Did the Cowardly Lion have to go all the way to OZ just to get his courage? Of course not; he had it within him all along, he just didn’t recognize it. You have the courage within you; do you recognize it?

Mary Anne Radmacher-Hershey said “Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says… I’ll try again tomorrow.”

Don’t be afraid, don’t doubt yourself, have courage, go forth and conquer your dreams and fulfill your potential and your destiny!

Hiring Your Legacy

I recently received this question on Ask John:

“I have the unique and thrilling opportunity to create and launch a territory from scratch. Having joined the exciting and expanding retailer (Company ABC) I currently find myself composing a team for the first eight locations in (State ABC).


Knowing your leadership ‘style’ and your past experience in building a successful team, I surely found it necessary to ask your guidance.

Clearly, I must first staff, train, draw expectations and execute…but I want to launch us with a sense of desire, courage, and passion that can be felt in each building at every level.

What would be your suggestions as to how to go about this?”

This is truly a wonderful and exciting opportunity for this person! Getting to build a team from scratch, from the ground up is an opportunity that most people long for. No baggage, no bad habits, starting from the ground up under your direction!

Whether you are building an entire organization or staffing one location, or just hiring one new person my advice would be as follows:

This is indeed a unique and thrilling opportunity that comes along very seldom in one’s career! This is your opportunity to build a premier team of your choosing. There are so many things to be considered and there are a lot of Do’s and Don’ts!

I am going to start with the Don’ts.

Don’t hire everyone whom you think is just like you. As good as you are you want variety and diversity

Don’t be afraid to hire people who are better than you. A lot of people are afraid of this and that is a huge mistake. It is just as important for you to be able to learn from your team as it is for your team to be able to learn from you.

Don’t be afraid to make a mistake. It is going to happen and you will need a backup plan for when it does. We have all experienced the Ugly Twin situation. You may be thrilled with your selection when you make an offer, and when they show up for work you ask yourself ‘did I really hire them’?  It happens!

Don’t rush the process. You certainly don’t buy the first house you look at so why would you rush on the hiring process?

Don’t rule someone out just because they don’t have every single qualification you might be looking for. Figure out where that person might fit into your organization.

Don’t hire everyone based on personality. You are running a business, not finding your best friend.

Don’t think your job is done just because you have the staff hired. This is where your job really starts.

Now let’s discuss the Do’s.

Do have a detailed plan as to what you need before you even go into the interviewing process. Building a team is just like building a house. You need a plan. How big, how many windows. How many bedrooms, 2 car garage or 3, what sort of cabinets, how many outlets do you need.

Do plan out the positions you need. I am not talking about Managers, Assistant Managers or Stock People. I am talking about needing someone who has a specific strength or aptitude in Operations, Merchandising, Recruiting, Training, an Idea person, an Executer, a Detailed person or a Big Picture person.

Do hire someone whom you can develop to be your replacement. If you want to grow and advance in your organization you will need someone who can take your place.

Do hire people whom you think can be an active and engaged part of the team. Yes you are the leader; you should not be the dictator.

Do use the first people you hire to help interview the other members of the team you might be interested in. This will do 3 things: it will give you a better understanding of the people’s ability, it will make them feel important and an active part of the building process, it will let the other candidates see that this is a group and team effort.

Do visit your candidates’ current place of employment. If you like what you see, great! If not, do not necessarily rule them out. Remember that people are chameleons. Perhaps they are not getting the direction they need or proper training.

Do use my Behavioral Based Assessments. OK, so I had to throw in a little self promotion!

When you are building your team it helps to think about sports. I know, me using a sports analogy, who knew? Think of a baseball team. The game is about to start and the team takes the field. All the players run out to left field because the coach only hired left field players. What do you think the chances are that the team will ever win a game? Nil to none!

A sense of desire, courage, and passion that can be felt in each building at every level comes from you. Desire, courage and passion are contagious; when the team sees that in you they will catch the fever. Constantly share and communicate with your team as this is vital for them to know and understand what is going on. A sure fired way to kill enthusiasm, excitement and commitment is for your team not to know what is going on.

There are two books that I would highly recommend and if you haven’t read them you should, both are by Patrick Lencioni; The FIVE Dysfunctions of a TEAM and The FOUR OBSESSIONS of an EXTRAORDINARY EXECUTIVE.

I would also suggest reading four of my previous blogs;

Inspiring the People You Lead

http://www.createawinningteam.com/inspiring-the-people-you-lead

How HARD is it? Just do it MY way!

http://www.createawinningteam.com/how-hard-is-it-just-do-it-my-way

Are You The Team Leader?

http://www.createawinningteam.com/are-you-the-team-leader

Employee Engagement

http://www.createawinningteam.com/employee-engagement

Just ask yourself this one question; if I were paying these people out of my own pocket, and I was depending on them to put food on my family’s table, would they be working for me?

Remember that you are hiring your legacy. The team that you create will be a lasting representation of you. The history books will document the success you had and the greatness you created!

This will most certainly be one of the most exciting and challenging adventures of your career!

Please keep me updated as to your emanate success!

Courage

If you think about the entire existence of the Universe, your life span could be compared to snapping your fingers. In other words, life is short – very short. Missing out on any of the joys life offers is a tragedy, but how many of us miss out on the joy life has to offer because we are afraid?

If your life is being controlled by your fears, you are most certainly cheating yourself, as well as those around you. If you are controlled by your fears you are not open to learn from others or share your greatness with them and this is denying them the opportunity to learn from you.

You have muscles and you exercise to keep them strong and healthy. They say the heart is the largest muscle we have. I suppose it is probably the largest physical muscle, but Courage is the mental muscle that conquers fear. Like all muscles, the more you use them the stronger they become. We are not born with courage because we are born fearless. As we age we develop fear which means we need to develop courage.

No one wants to be in prison but individuals who fail to develop courage, remain confined in mental prisons and face each day as mental lightweights.

It has been said if you face the thing you fear, fear leaves you. Think of the first time you tried to ride a bike. You probably fell off and were afraid. Someone made you get back on that bike, you did, you rode successfully and suddenly that fear was gone. You conquered it! Congratulations!

Everyone has fear it’s just that courageous people understand the importance of facing their fears and taming them like a wild horse. Have you ever heard of Eddie Rickenbacker? Edward Vernon Rickenbacker (October 8, 1890 – July 27, 1973) was an American fighter ace in World War I and Medal of Honor recipient. He was also a race car driver and automotive designer, a government consultant in military matters and a pioneer in air transportation, particularly as the longtime head of Eastern Air Lines. Eddie said “Courage is doing what you are afraid to do. There can be no courage without fear.” We all have fear; however, not everyone becomes subservient to their fears.

There is, very likely, something you have wanted to do for years – move to another city, start your own business, apply for that better position, change careers, go after the big account, ask someone to marry you, buy a house, start a family. Whatever it is you should do it. Remember, life is not a dress rehearsal. This is it. Curtain up, show time! A little courage leads to more courage; it’s like a snowball rolling downhill.

Take a look around you at the people you know who live without courage. They hide in the shadows of others. They have no opinions because they are afraid. They make no attempt to lead. They sit in the back corners. They almost seem non-existent. They merely tiptoe through life, quiet as a church mouse hoping they make it safely to death. Is this any way to live your life?

You and I were never meant to live this way. We were not meant to ride the little horse on the merry-go-round. We were meant to ride a Champion! We were meant to grab life by the reigns and say ‘let’s go’! If we fall off we were meant to get up and get back on! Learn to live the way you like by no longer living as you dislike. So buck up little pony and let’s ride!

What fear will you face, attack and conquer this week?

What will you do this week to attack the remainder of your days with an abundance of courage?

Now that’s living life to the fullest!

Courage

If you think about the entire existence of the Universe, your life span could be compared to lighting a candle and immediately blowing it out. In other words, life is short – very short. Missing out on any of the joys life offers is a tragedy.

If your life is being controlled by your fears, you are most certainly cheating yourself, as well as those around you. If you are controlled by your fears you are not open to share your greatness with others and this is denying them the opportunity to learn from you.

You have muscles and you exercise to keep them strong and healthy. They say the heart is the largest muscle we have. I suppose it is probably the largest physical muscle, but Courage is the mental muscle that conquers fear. Like all muscles, the more you use them the stronger they become. Courage is not something you are born with, it must be developed.

No one wants to be in prison but individuals who fail to develop courage, remain confined in mental prisons and face each day as mental lightweights.

It has been said if you face the thing you fear, fear leaves you.

I used to believe that courageous individuals had no fear. Now I realize that everyone has fear, it’s just that courageous people understand the importance of facing their fears and taming them like a wild jungle cat. Eddie Rickenbacker put it very well when he said, “There is no courage without fear.” We all have fear; however, not everyone becomes subservient to their fears.

There is, very likely, something you have wanted to do for years – move to another city, start your own business, apply for that better position, go after the big account, ask someone to marry you, buy a house, start a family. Whatever it is you should do it. Remember, life is not a dress rehearsal. This is it. Curtain up, show time! A little courage leads to more courage; it’s like a snowball rolling downhill.

Observe those poor souls who are without courage. They merely tiptoe through life hoping they make it safely to death.

You and I were never meant to live that way. Learn to live the way you like by no longer living as you dislike.

What will you do today to attack the remainder of your day with an abundance of courage?

That’s living!