Monthly Archives: May 2010

Your Swimming Pool, Your Life

May 28, 2010

It’s HOT! Summer is fast approaching and here in Chicago it already hit 90 degrees. With Memorial Day weekend upon us it is time to open up the pools!

Wouldn’t you like to have a swimming pool? Just imagine clear, clean fresh water, a relaxing and enjoyable place for you to unwind. You want your pool to be a happy place. Sometimes you want to be in the pool alone just to think, being relaxed and float around on your raft. Sometimes you want to invite friends or family, maybe just a few or maybe a lot.

Guess what? You have a pool and it’s called your life! All the energy that is all around you, that makes up your reality, is water in your pool. Your goal in life is to be happy; not content or satisfied but happy. Sometimes being happy means your pool is peaceful and quiet, no drama, no ripples or waves just calm. Sometimes being happy means splashing about, loud music, and lots of friends sharing your pool.

Think about all of the people in your pool, your life. Some you like and some you love and some you don’t really care for that much like certain relatives or co-workers but you are stuck with them. Many of these people respect your pool, know when you want calm or you want waves, but others are not so respectful. These people will insist on doing a cannonball and knocking you off your float!

You can control who swims in your pool. You don’t have to allow everyone you meet into your pool or to have access to your energy or life. Some people are allowed only in the shallow end where they can’t do too much splashing. You can allow those you choose to come into the deep end with you. Some of the people you invite into the deep end won’t pass the swimming test and won’t make it past the rope. Some of the people you meet won’t be allowed in the pool at all. They can come in the yard but they will have to stay up on the deck!

Your pool needs proper maintenance; you need to clean the filter, clean your floats, scoop out the dirt and give it some chlorine to keep the water fresh. You have to clean out your life too.

A pool only holds so much water; we can only hold so much in our life. Sometimes if we want to take on someone or something new we have to let go of something old. Only so many people and so many toys will fit.

People come into our lives for a particular reason at a particular time. They come into our lives to teach us something, to provide nourishment that we need. We are in their lives for the same reasons. Just like little arm floaters for children when those lessons are learned the relationship is over. The relationship can end painfully, amicably, or it can just drift off to the other end of the pool. We just can’t fit everything and everyone in the pool at the same time.

Think about your pool. Is it time for a clean-up? Is everyone at a safe depth? Are there people you want to invite in? Are there people that pee in your pool?

It is especially difficult to control your pool around those you work with. When someone hears you are having a pool party there will always be someone wanting an invite that you don’t like or even know. It is essential that you control who gets in the pool but how do you do that? Perhaps you are very careful to only invite those that you know and trust. Maybe you throw a big party and invite everyone. Then you can go back and decide who was too loud, who drank too much, who ate too much, who hogged all the rafts, who made ‘bubbles’ in your pool!

Yes, having a pool can be difficult and a lot of work, but it can also be a great deal of fun.

Having a happy life can be even more difficult, more work but it can also be so much fun and so very much worth the effort!

It is your pool and your life.  You control who gets to swim!

I hope you all have a great, happy and safe Memorial Day Weekend!

By John | Posted in Your Life | Tagged , , , , , | Comments (0)

How HARD is it? Just do it MY way!

May 25, 2010

Most managers, supervisors and leaders admit that delegating a task is one of the hardest things they have to do. You’ve heard it before: “if you want it right, you have to do it yourself.”  While that may be true in some cases, just because you’re the best at something doesn’t mean that you need to do it yourself. We all have 24-hour days and if you do everything yourself you’re putting a limit on how much you can accomplish and how much positive effect you can have on your team.

Focus on the Most Important Tasks

I know what you are thinking, everything is important. Well guess what Sparky; everything is not important; at least not right here and not right now. No matter how important you are or think you are there is a time and a place for everything. You have to establish a priority list. Unless you have magical powers you have the same 24 hours in a day that everyone else does. Therefore you have to establish what gets done when and by whom because you cannot mentally or physically accomplish everything by yourself.

Hire People that Are Better than You and Let Them Do Their Job

Having great people on your team makes all the difference. If you hire whoever is available right this minute or who is the cheapest, forget about delegating; you’ll always have to micromanage them. Why would you want to micromanage anyone that you have hired to help you run your business? How about giving them the training they need to be successful?  Hire people that are better than you and let them do their job. Unfortunately a lot of supervisors have a fear of hiring people better than they are. They have a fear that maybe others will think they are better and they will be replaced. As a true leader you should never be afraid of this. This is your job and it will make your job a heck of a lot easier! But remember: they’re not you. They’ll do things differently and this is not a bad thing. Different is not bad; it’s just different. What’s that expression? Oh yes, there’s more than one way to skin a cat! The old ‘it’s my way or the highway’ philosophy is archaic and unless your goal is to be the Supreme Ruler of the Universe I suggest you abandon it immediately! Avoid being a control freak; explain to them the desired outcome and let them choose the path they want to get there. Don’t expect other people to work just like you. That’s not how it works.

Have Realistic Expectations

When people do something for the first time, they almost always make mistakes. That is simply a part of life. A big part of your job is to properly train them so that mistakes are minimized! Expecting them to do everything perfectly the first time wouldn’t be realistic. After all, it took you a few weeks or months to do it as well as you do it now. When you need to tell people they made a mistake, start by showing your appreciation for all the great effort they put into something, explain how they can do it better next time and finish by thanking them for doing such great work. In general, people do not intentionally do a poor job. Most people really do try hard to please the boss.  A truly great leader would recognize that effort.

Take Responsibility

More times than not, when we delegate and something goes wrong we tend to blame whomever we delegated to. What about your responsibility in this process? Did you clearly define the goals, the outcome, and the process? Did you properly train the team member to deliver the results you expected or needed? You gave the message, are you certain it was clear?

Delegation is not that difficult or complicated. Effective delegation allows you to get a great deal more accomplished than you could on your own. Delegation and the appropriate completion of tasks is an outstanding learning opportunity for your associate as well as for you.

If you want to be the Supreme Ruler of the Universe then go ahead and either do everything yourself, or insist that everything be done your way. If you want to be a functioning part of the world as we know it, then learn to delegate.

Following these four steps will enable you to delegate effectively and to accomplish everything on your plate:

  • · Focus on the Most Important Tasks
  • Hire People that Are Better than You and Let Them Do Their Job
  • Have Realistic Expectations
  • Take Responsibility
By John | Posted in How HARD is it? Just do it MY way! | Tagged , , , , , , | Comment (1)

The Sun and the Moon

May 21, 2010

Have you ever thought about what a dynamic duo the Sun and the Moon are?

I like to think about it as the Sun is the Leader. It rises and sets on its’ own time, not yours. The Sun knows when it needs a rest and when you do. It understands that for today, enough is enough. It doesn’t matter what kind of day you have had. Maybe it was the best day ever and you never want it to end or maybe it was the worst day ever and you just want it to be over, but the Sun will decide when the day is over. It is not for you to worry about, the Sun as the leader will guide you.

When the Sun decides to set, it passes the watch over to the Moon. The Sun doesn’t give the Moon directions or instructions for it knows the Moon knows what to do and how to handle things. It doesn’t micro manage the Moon for they have worked together for years. The Moon provides us with the opportunity to reflect on the day. It allows us to be proud of our accomplishments, or to plan our improvement. The Moon gives us an opportunity to think, reflect and to plan.

In the morning the Sun will rise on its’ own time, regardless of what happened yesterday or if we think we are ready.  It might be in full sight, or it might be behind the clouds, but it has risen to start anew. The Sun, as a leader says, get up! Let’s do something magical today!

The Suns responsibility is to give light, warmth, nourishment and opportunity. The Sun only cares about today for it knows nothing of yesterday; yesterday cannot be changed. It gives you a chance to repeat your victories and successes of the past or to correct your mistakes and failures. The excitement or the sorrow is gone for today is a new day; a new start. The Sun knows nothing of yesterday and is only focused on today.

Shouldn’t our relationships at work with our co-workers, peers, subordinates and the boss be more like the relationship between the Sun and the Moon? A relationship built on give and take and a sharing of responsibility is easier on everyone and is more effective. A relationship where you can have the support of those you work with, where you can pass the cup of control when you just need a little break to relax or when you just need a little help. A relationship where there is no battle over control, no politics, no games just a spirit of total cooperation. A relationship where there is no need for micro managing because everyone knows their job. A relationship built on trust, support and working in full harmony.

Do your work relationships function in such perfect unison? If so, congratulations and good for you! If not, what will you do to fine tune those relationships to eliminate tensions and to begin to function as effectively as the Sun and the Moon? What will you do to improve performance and to help guarantee success and greatness?

The Sun gives you a new dawn, a new day to define and exhibit your full potential, to deliver your greatness.

Perhaps we should be more like the Sun and the Moon: rise early, start over, let your greatness shine forth, pass your accomplishments and shortcomings to someone to watch over, repeat!

Enjoy the Sun, seize the day and seize the opportunity to let your greatness blaze, for it is one day at a time that we go forward!

By John | Posted in The Sun and the Moon | Tagged , , , , , | Comments (0)

Courage

May 20, 2010

If you think about the entire existence of the Universe, your life span could be compared to lighting a candle and immediately blowing it out. In other words, life is short – very short. Missing out on any of the joys life offers is a tragedy.

If your life is being controlled by your fears, you are most certainly cheating yourself, as well as those around you. If you are controlled by your fears you are not open to share your greatness with others and this is denying them the opportunity to learn from you.

You have muscles and you exercise to keep them strong and healthy. They say the heart is the largest muscle we have. I suppose it is probably the largest physical muscle, but Courage is the mental muscle that conquers fear. Like all muscles, the more you use them the stronger they become. Courage is not something you are born with, it must be developed.

No one wants to be in prison but individuals who fail to develop courage, remain confined in mental prisons and face each day as mental lightweights.

It has been said if you face the thing you fear, fear leaves you.

I used to believe that courageous individuals had no fear. Now I realize that everyone has fear, it’s just that courageous people understand the importance of facing their fears and taming them like a wild jungle cat. Eddie Rickenbacker put it very well when he said, “There is no courage without fear.” We all have fear; however, not everyone becomes subservient to their fears.

There is, very likely, something you have wanted to do for years – move to another city, start your own business, apply for that better position, go after the big account, ask someone to marry you, buy a house, start a family. Whatever it is you should do it. Remember, life is not a dress rehearsal. This is it. Curtain up, show time! A little courage leads to more courage; it’s like a snowball rolling downhill.

Observe those poor souls who are without courage. They merely tiptoe through life hoping they make it safely to death.

You and I were never meant to live that way. Learn to live the way you like by no longer living as you dislike.

What will you do today to attack the remainder of your day with an abundance of courage?

That’s living!

By John | Posted in hmms | Tagged , , , | Comments (0)

Image or Substance?

May 18, 2010

Too many of today’s leaders are more concerned with politics than they are with performance.

Too many leaders are more concerned with image than substance. She isn’t very attractive, he isn’t very handsome, she is too fat, and he is too short, she doesn’t dress very well, his teeth are crooked, and they don’t fit the image. What about the ability to do the job? Where does that fit into the picture?

Far too often leaders define themselves by what they are instead of who they are.

This is my title, this is how many people work for me, this is the kind of car I drive, this is how much money I make, this is where I live, and these are all the people who worship me.

Does any of this matter? Does a true leader worry about what they have more than what they do for others? I think not.

Would you rather have a dinner that wasn’t fit to eat served on fine china or would you rather have a delicious meal served on a paper plate?

What are your priorities as a leader?

As leaders it is time to stop putting your focus on image and start paying attention to substance.

The Hot Chocolate Story

A group of graduates, well established in their careers, were talking at a reunion and decided to go visit their old university professor, now retired. During their visit, the conversation turned to complaints about stress in their work and lives. Offering his guests hot chocolate, the professor went into the kitchen and returned with a large pot of hot chocolate and an assortment of cups-porcelain, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite — telling them to help themselves to the hot chocolate. When they all had a cup of hot chocolate in hand, the professor said:

“Notice that all the nice looking; expensive cups were taken, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress.

The cup that you’re drinking from adds nothing to the quality of the hot chocolate. In most cases it is just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we drink. What all of you really wanted was hot chocolate, not the cup; but you consciously went for the best cups… And then you began eyeing each other’s cups.”

Now consider this: Life is the hot chocolate; your job, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain life. The cup you have does not define, nor change the quality of life you have. Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the hot chocolate we have.”

The happiest people don’t have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything that they have.

As a leader are you going to be more concerned with what cup your life is served in, or what purpose your life serves?

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. And enjoy your hot chocolate!- Anonymous

By John | Posted in Image or Substance? | Tagged , , , , | Comments (0)

Performance Evaluation

May 14, 2010

“We need to discuss your performance.”

These words often bring discomfort to managers at every level.

However, when conducted well, performance discussions create stronger working relationships, highlight priorities, and identify developmental needs of individuals to meet either short-term or long-term goals.

There is always a great deal of conversation and debate around performance evaluations and the employee appraisal process. What is the real purpose? Does it serve a purpose? What does anyone get out of them? Why should we even bother to waste our time?

If a supervisor or the leadership team sees no value in the performance evaluation process then either

  • They don’t understand the process
  • They don’t know how to effectively conduct the process
  • They shouldn’t be part of the leadership team.

Employee appraisals are critical and crucial for the growth and development of not only the employee but for the company as well. The evaluation should really consist of three parts:

  • A recap of areas where the associate performed well
  • A recap of areas where the associate fell short of expectations
  • A clear and concise roadmap and plan for success.

First please note that for the first two above I used the word recap. If the supervisor has been doing their job all along it is just a recap. It should be nothing the associate hasn’t heard before. It’s called feedback folks and I addressed this in a previous post about Employee Engagement.

The United States Department of Agriculture has a policy that reads “A formal appraisal may not be given unless a performance plan (elements and standards) was established and communicated to the employee and the employee has served under this plan for 90 days or more.” This is something that I think all companies should follow and that unfortunately most companies fail to do. We hire the person and put them in place, hopefully with training, but we fail to give the employee a clear and concise written plan including standards and expectations. Companies don’t follow up with feedback and then whack the associate upside the head with a poor review.

How much time do supervisors actually put into writing a performance evaluation? Not nearly enough! In a survey of H.R. Professionals from LinkedIn 15 to 60 minutes was the average time spent on writing an evaluation.  For an entire year? Are you kidding me? I think part of this is because the supervisor doesn’t really know the associate and doesn’t really know what they actually do or how they do it. In a previous post, Assessing Your Employees I discuss the importance of getting to know your associates in order to be able to evaluate their performance.

I have heard of Leadership Teams who suggest:

  • Everyone is automatically getting a 3% cost of living increase so we don’t need to do evaluations
  • No one is getting an increase this year so we don’t need to do evaluations
  • We will only give evaluations to our top performers
  • We will only give evaluations to our bottom performers

Wow, these are all bad ideas in my opinion!

Even if everyone is getting the same monetary increase or no increase at all you still need to let the associates know how they are doing and what you expect from them in the upcoming year.

Let’s say you only give reviews to your top performers. What does that say to those who don’t get a review other than “hello there useless waste of space, why are you still here?”

Let’s say you only give reviews to your bottom performers. Now what does that say to those who get the review other than “hello there useless waste of space, why are you still here? You won’t be here much longer!”

Why would any company give those sorts of messages? Companies like this are probably not a candidate for Forbes Best 100 Companies to work for!

As I stated above, yes you have to address the past performance as a recap. If you are just bringing up issues now at review time, then shame on you. Why did you go all year without addressing performance issues or concerns? Want to really waste your time and create bad performance? This is a guaranteed technique. Don’t talk to staff during the year. When they mess up, don’t deal with it at the time but SAVE it up. Then, at the appraisal meeting, bring out everything saved up in the bank and dump it in the employee’s lap. That will show them who the boss is!

Supervisors forget that the appraisal process is about improvement not blame; it is about setting a roadmap, a plan for success for both the employee and the company. You need to ask and establish:

  • What direction do you want the associate to go in,
  • What do they need to do in order to be successful,
  • What does the associate need to do to help the company be successful,
  • What help, direction or guidance are you as the supervisor going to give the associate,
  • What is the specific plan,
  • When will you be touching base again to evaluate

We do appraisals to improve performance, not find a donkey to pin a tail on or blame. Managers who forget this end up developing staffs that don’t trust them, or even can’t stand them. That’s because the blaming process is pointless, and doesn’t help anyone. The whole point of a performance appraisal is to get managers and employees working together to improve performance and relationships.

If you follow these steps you will find that the Performance Evaluation process is easy, painless and mutually beneficial to the employee and the company:

  • Evaluate on a constant basis
  • Provide constant feedback
  • Recognize good performance to encourage it to be continued
  • Address performance issues as they arise
  • Keep notes
  • Communicate
  • Recap areas where the associate performed well
  • Recap areas where the associate fell short of expectations
  • Develop a clear and concise roadmap and action plan for success with the employee
  • Give your total support to the associate

If you follow these guidelines your employee, you and your company will find that the Performance Evaluation process is painless, a true benefit to you and the company, and will set everyone up for success!

By John | Posted in Performance Evaluation | Tagged , , , , , , , | Comment (1)

Everyone Can Be A Winner

May 11, 2010

One way to help yourself be a winner is to focus on a mindset that eliminates

  • The element of competition
  • The need to win
  • The need to always be right

The problem with focusing on competition and making yourself a winner is that someone then has to lose. It is the ‘I will make myself feel better if I can make you feel worse’ philosophy. However if you focus instead on creating a win-win situation then not only will you be a winner but your success will foster the success of others and others’ success will help foster your success. Contempt is the Father of contempt; Success is the Mother of success. Which parent do you want to be?

While so much of our society is focused on competition and winning at all costs, this is ultimately a very destructive mindset. A team that works together is always stronger than a group of individuals only out for their individual purposes. If group members are only out for their own purposes, only out for their own success then that group is certainly not a team. If you can apply this principle to every aspect of your life then you can achieve tremendous success.

The truth is that if you set up competition in most areas of your life then you lose even when you win. For example, if you “win” an argument with your spouse what do you gain and what do you lose? Perhaps you scored the most points in the argument or simply wore down your significant other until they gave in. Now you have your way regarding your weekend plans, or where to go on vacation or what color to paint the bathroom.

But what damage has been done to your relationship?

  • How does your spouse feel about you?
  • How will he or she feel as they participate in the activity you won?
  • How much damage will accumulate to your relationship if you win the next argument?
  • And the next?

The same is true about competition in other areas of your life. If you win a competition at work then you may reap benefits in term of recognition and even monetary rewards. But if your win comes at the cost of your co-workers then not only will they feel like losers but they may well resent your success. How well will you work together as a team in the future? What will happen when you need those people to work with you on a project?

Let’s say that your boss or a co-worker wants you to help them with a project that you don’t really want to help with. You can throw a tantrum, say you are too busy, make a scene and you can get out of helping. What will that have accomplished? What happens to the cooperation the next time you need help with something? Will it have been worth it to win that fight?

So what is the alternative? After all, no one wants to be a loser and the perception is that if you are not a winner then you are a loser. But what if you can create a situation where everyone wins? What if you can eliminate the competition? Remember, your short term win is a long term lose if it damages your relationship with your spouse, child, co-worker, or friend.

How do you create a win-win situation? There are four components:

  • You have to keep your long-term goals in mind for that relationship which may mean that you need to remind yourself and reaffirm to the others involved that you value yourself and the other person (or people involved).
  • You also need the maturity to strike a balance between strength of purpose and empathy.
  • You need to believe that there is enough success for everyone. You need to be a big enough person to understand that there is more than enough for everyone so it does not cost you to share in the success. Helping or allowing another to succeed will not diminish your success and in fact may well enhance it.
  • You have to decide what is really important in your life.

Making the decision to change your mindset from win-lose to win-win is not easy and then following through with that philosophy change can be extremely difficult. Most of us have been conditioned from early childhood to compete in every aspect of our lives. However once you give up that competitive mindset and focus on helping everyone win then you will be on a sure path to success in life.

Who will you help to win today?

By John | Posted in Everyone Can Be A Winner | Tagged , , , | Comment (1)

Mediocrity

May 10, 2010

Any time you tolerate mediocrity in others, it increases your mediocrity.

An important attribute in successful people is their impatience with mediocrity, negative thinking and negative acting people.

Do not accept mediocrity from others and especially not from yourself. Do not tolerate negative thoughts or actions.

Before you start telling everyone how much you know, start by being an example and showing them how much you care about them.

People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.

Be the example of positive behavior that you want to see and that you expect from others.

Make what you do today important.

After all, you are exchanging a day of your life for it.

What will you do today that will be important and make a positive change in someone’s life?

By John | Posted in hmms | Tagged , , , , , | Comments (0)

Be Careful What You Teach

May 7, 2010

You’re a teacher, I’m a teacher, and we are all teachers. The question is what and how do you teach?

Sometimes when we teach it is intentional. Sometimes, perhaps too often it is unintentional which can lead to problems if we are not careful!

As parents a great deal of your teaching is indeed intentional:

  • Be polite
  • Don’t smoke
  • Don’t drink
  • Don’t swear
  • Clean up after yourself
  • Don’t speed
  • Don’t talk on the phone and drive
  • Don’t lie
  • Always give 100%

These are all very good lessons but how much learning takes place if you don’t model the behaviors you are teaching? What happens when you are not polite, you smoke and drink, you swear like a sailor? I don’t really know any sailors but you hear that expression a lot! What learning takes place when you are a slob or you drive 45 in a 30 zone while talking on the phone?

What are you teaching unintentionally?

As a boss you spend time intentionally teaching your employees:

  • Don’t steal
  • Learn the rules in the handbook
  • Respect for others
  • We pay you for 40 hours of work
  • Stealing company time is stealing
  • Only list business expenses on your expense report
  • Always be accountable for your actions and decisions

These are all important lessons to teach. But what happens when you take office supplies home with you. It’s just a pack of paper, right? Ignore the rules in the handbook because you think they don’t apply to you, or call people names behind their backs? What are you really teaching if you come in late and leave early, spend half your work day on Facebook or emailing jokes to friends and push blame on to whoever is closest at the time?

What are you teaching unintentionally?

Never ever stop teaching people intentionally all of the skills and knowledge you possess. But it is essential that you think about how you are teaching and what your actions are really telling your students. Actions really do speak louder than words.

What will you teach others this week?

Will what you teach be intentional or unintentional?

Will your actions model the behaviors you want them to learn?

Be careful what you teach.

By John | Posted in Be Careful What You Teach | Comments (0)

Clap and Cheer!

May 6, 2010

A small boy was auditioning with his classmates for a school play.

His mother knew that he’d set his heart on being in the play – just like all the other children hoped too – and she feared how he would react if he was not chosen. On the day the parts were awarded, the little boy’s mother went to the school gates to collect her son.

The little lad rushed up to her, eyes shining with pride and excitement. “Guess what Mum,” he shouted, and then said the words that provide a lesson to us all,

“I’ve been chosen to clap and cheer.”

What a wonderful Outlook!

What attitude will YOU choose today?

By John | Posted in hmms | Comments (0)